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Class:COM375/the next essays/Assignment3

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Students were given their choice of topic to develop into a communication analysis. There were no length requirements. Students were encouraged to write as much as necessary (and no more) in order to generate a thorough, comprehensive, educational, and persuasive analysis of their chosen area of interest using one of the most common intellectual frameworks of the discipline of communication: semiotic analysis.



It was a beautiful summer day. Steph laced up her AirJordan’s and headed out the door. She had saved up 3 weeks pay from her Minimum wage job to purchase a train ticket to New York to see the Boston Red Sox and the New York Mets battle it out. Getting a ticket to the game however was much easier as Steph had won The Sox Wherever You Want prize package allowing her free tickets to any game in which the Red Sox were playing. Since she had spent last night attending a 50 Cent concert to research Dimes and what they mean for Hip Hop for her blog, she was very tired and hoped to catch a nice nap on the train. Sadly for our protagonist, upon boarding the train she was forced to sit next to one of the most annoying people ever. It was Chris Harihar who only rides the train because no one would dare talk to him unless they were trapped in a steel box moving at high speeds. He introduced himself as Steph tried to adjust her ipod headphones and ignore him. Her efforts went in vain as Chris began giving her his views on everything from Abortion to The Death Penalty in America. Steph turned up the volume on her ipod hoping the Dr. Dre beats she was blasting would drown out this dullard. The Times They Are A-Changing thought Steph, reminiscing about a time when people used to sit like zombies on the train and not engage in useless chit chat with someone they’ll never see again. Chris, seemingly unfazed, continued his rants. Finally, Chris overstepped his boundaries by asking Steph’s thoughts on his new Prince Albert piercing. “Good lord, Is anything private these days?” screamed Steph. Chris was so scared by this that he began crying. Steph felt bad that she had snapped at the annoying yet obviously vulnerable Chris and apologized for the outburst. Chris told her not to worry as he wasn’t that upset at her but he was feeling lonely as he’d spent his last few days away from home for the first time. He went on to explain how he was feeling very homesick and Dreaming of a Father's Love. “Jeez stop blubbering I didn’t ask for your life story,” said Steph, obviously annoyed that Chris thought he was on Dr. Phil. Finally, when she was sure she couldn’t handle anymore of this crybaby’s antics, the train pulled into Shea Stadium. Steph looked at the banner that ran atop the stadium reading “The Team The Time.”. Not today, thought Steph as she stepped out of the train in all her Red Sox apparel.

Steph moved quickly as to try and lose Chris in the crowd. Whew! She exclaimed as she finally lost sight of the obnoxious train passenger. It’s all downhill from here she thought to herself as she headed from the train station to the stadium entrance. Steph’s mood quickly changed as she realized she’d have to walk through a crowd of hippies who were handing out pamphlets on their Alternative View of 9/11. She went over to check out this worthwhile cause but was stopped dead in her tracks when one of the hippies, reeking of marijuana, came up and told her that this was just a front for them to sleep in tents and smoke weed. “Legalize it” shouted the hippie as he offered Steph a puff of his “funny cigarette”. In the crowd she noticed Liv, who was wearing her sorority sweatshirt. “Liv, I didn’t know you were a baseball fan,” said Steph as she inquired how Life as a SigDelt was treating her. Liv explained that sorority life was good. She didn’t really like baseball but was there with her sisters to watch this Sports Production because she had a crush on Big Pappi, the Red Sox Slugging DH. Steph and Liv said their goodbyes and Steph headed towards the gate. After picking up her tickets Steph was outraged to find a dangling participle in one of the billboards near the stadium. As she was about to pull out her flamethrower and burn the sign down, someone told her that the sign was originally written in Korean and that sometimes people let grammar rules slide when Advertising Across Cultures. Steph wasn’t buying it and set fire to the billboard sending the burning wreckage plummeting down on the crowd of hippies below. Steph then torched a Disney banner saying that it was helping to contribute to the Commercialization of Childhood and then an Este Lauder billboard because it promotes the message of The Kept Woman as a Commodity. Feeling that she’d accomplished enough good deeds for the day, our hero entered the stadium. Steph sat in her seat with a fresh beer and listened as the stadium announcer called out rap singer Guerilla Black to do the national anthem. Steph, looking puzzled, turned to the person next to her and exclaimed “King Kong is Black? What?!” "Entschuldigung Bitte, um, excuse me," the German dude replied, "Warum Schreien Wir?"

THE END According to Lawrence.

Screw Silk. I'm not rewriting anything.

^I think this story is great lol... Is it possible to fix the discussion page? Estelle's paper is there everytime i click on it. I'd delete it but I don't know if I'm supposed to... Chrisismadgoodatwriting 12:15, 15 May 2006 (EDT)

Now, you'll have to corporate my new Essay into your story... Ha ha! Re-write it, Biatch!!! Silk 13:33, 17 May 2006 (EDT)

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